Four Powerful Coaching Questions to Help You Make Choices That Will Enrich Your Life

Your life is a result of the choices you make, if you don’t like your life it is time to make better choices - Author unknown

Making wrong choices can sometimes leave you feeling empty, regretful, guilty, or just plain unhappy? Very often people find themselves making choices that do not add value to their life, choices that do nothing to help them reach their goals, and sometimes push them further from becoming the person they desire to be? It is not always easy to make the right decisions. Even after spending countless hours or days deliberating over what choice to make in any given instance, often many of us find ourselves making choices that are comfortable, convenient, and do not require any courage on our part. The good news is there are a four powerful question you can ask yourself, before making decisions about your life. These thought provoking questions will ultimately lead you to making decisions that will clarify what you really want and move you in the direction of your true desires and enrich you life 

Question # 1 

Am I honoring my values? 

You are less likely to feel regretful about the decision you make when you make a decision that is in line with your values. For instance, if you value adventure, freedom, and being outdoors, you will more than likely regret taking a job that requires you to sit at a desk all day at a 9-5 job, with a boss who dictates your every move. If you value creativity, independence, and freedom, you may feel extremely happy about a decision to pursue an entrepreneur opportunity doing something you love.

Question # 2 

Will this decision make me happy?

I remember shopping with a friend and her daughter a while back and my friend was helping her four-year old daughter pick out a pair of shoes. There were so many options, but each time my friend showed her daughter a pair of shoes she shook her head, indication “no”. Finally, I asked my friends daughter why she did not want a certain pair of very pretty shoes and she responded, “They don’t make me happy”.  I will always remember her response. It made such an impact on me. I started asking myself that very question whenever I find myself having to make important decisions, “Does it make me happy”. 

Question # 3

Is this decision rooted in fear?

Making a decision out of fear will usually lead to disappointment. Usually fear based decisions are a result of negative thinking about yourself. Thoughts such as I am not good enough, smart enough, or I am not worthy of anything good. I do not deserve this, or who do I think I am to expect more. Maybe thoughts such as no one else will want to spend time with me, or I should be grateful that I have this opportunity, how dare I expect anything better.

Question # 4
Is this decision in line with my goals and dreams? 

Do you have goals that you would like to achieve? Do you dream of living a happier, more fulfilling life? If so, you might want to ask yourself this question the next time you find yourself tempted to make a decision that might steer you in the wrong direction. The only way to achieve your goals and live your dreams is to be clear about what you want and what steps and decisions you must make in order to make your dreams a reality.

Everyone faces challenges from time to time, often finding that the decisions we make are not always the best decision. However, everyone has what it take s to make choices that are right for them  by taking time to asked themselves a few questions that will give them clarity and help them make choices that will enrich their life. 

Carla Burrows created a community of encouragement and support that is dedicated to helping others "Create a Life and Work You Love".  She is the author of  "Yes You Really Can: Live the Life of Your Dreams", and the contributing author of  "The Women's Handbook for Self Confidence".

Carla's books, newsletters, articles, and Blog offers inspiration, encouragement, and support that helps others create a life and work they love through personal development, discovering of purpose, and entrepreneurship.


Follow Carla:
Website www.carlaburrows.com
Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/pages/Carla-Burrows-Create-a-Life-and-Work-You-Love/559941097367470

Promises

This is a nice poem that I ran across in my research, I thought maybe it could also inspire someone else. Enjoy you day.

“Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel
that there is something in them
To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.
To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.”

― Christian D. Larson, Your Forces and How to Use Them

I  hope these inspiring words encourage you to day. If they do leave a comment below to let the others in our community know how they encouraged you. Talk to you soon.

Carla Burrows created a community of encouragement and support that is dedicated to helping others "Create and Live a Life You Love.  She is the author of  "Yes You Really Can: Live the Life of Your Dreams", and the contributing author of  "The Women's Handbook for Self Confidence".

Carla's books, newsletters, articles, and Blog offers inspiration, encouragement, and support that helps others create and live a life they love, achieve their goals, live there dreams,  and enrich their lives.

Follow Carla:
Website www.carlaburrows.com
Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/pages/Carla-Burrows-Create-and-Live-a-Life-You-Love/559941097367470?ref=hl

Are Your Withholding Your Own Happiness: Three Ways To Increase Your Happiness and Enjoy You Life

 Happiness is not something that is ready made. It comes from your own action. 

-Dalai Lama XIV

Just over a week ago, I resigned from a job that consumed most of my life. I enjoyed the time and experience gained as nurse manager, I grew as a leader and I met a group of wonderful people along the journey. However, there was often conflict with the expectations that came with the responsibilities of being a nurse in a leadership role. I often found myself having to put the job before my family life, my educational goals, and my personal life development goals. Many times, I even found myself sacrificing my own emotional and physical health. Leaving the position was bitter sweet however I realized that what I was really sacrificing was my happiness. I knew that if I wanted to reclaim my happiness, I could not wait around for it to show up one day, but I would have to take action.

Have you ever found yourself in a position where you had to put your own happiness on hold because of your responsibilities? Have you ever found that in the pursuit of career endeavors, volunteer opportunities, or other people's demands on your life, you lost your own sense of self and swayed away from you true values. 

Take Responsibility for Your Own Happiness 

Here are three specifics steps you can take right now to increase you happiness and enjoy your life.

1. Revisit Your Core Values

What is important to you? What really matters? Some of my core values are freedom, spirit, independence, and making a difference. I also value personal time, family time, personal development and my health. Which means that whatever I pursue in life must allow me to continue to honor these values, if not my happiness level will diminish over time. What are you core values, what areas of your life must you hold onto at all cost.

2. Say "Yes" to "No"

Once I decided to leave my job, I set out to find something that was conducive to my current lifestyle and would allow me to honor my values. First, I listed out everything I wanted in my next job, including the hours I wanted to work, weekends off, no on-call responsibilities, and great benefits. I then released my request to God in prayer and set out to find this job. I did find a job that fit my request perfectly. Of course, as soon as I resigned I began to get other offers. One offer was very tempting. It played toward my ego, great status, and big increase in pay,  which offered a false sense of financial security. I struggled with the decision for about a week or two, I then prayed about it. The answer to my prayer was obvious, I was considering lowering my standards, and foregoing my own values and happiness because someone tempted me with money and status, wich by the way are not my core values. I had to give myself permission to say 'yes to "no". Now I have time to pursue my true passion, making a difference in the lives of others. 

3. Honor Your True Passion 

What activities make you happy. What are you doing when you look up and realize that hours have past and it felt like just a short while. This happens to me when I am reading, writing, or working outside with my flowers (until it gets too hot). I love personal development topics, I enjoy one-on-one, or small group conversations with like-minded people, as well as traveling with my husband. What activities or passion do you enjoy? What can you do to make time to do more of the things you love.

Do you feel that in some way you may be withholding happiness from your life. If so, you do not have to quit your job in order to take responsibility for your own happiness and enjoy your life. However, it is you responsibility to make necessary adjustment in your life in order to honor your self and your life so that you can increase your happiness and enjoy your life 

Leave a comment below: Do you want to increase your happiness and enjoy your life? Share one thing you can do this week to protect your core values, say "yes" to "no", and or honor you true passion. 

 

Carla Burrows created a community of encouragement and support that is dedicated to helping others "Create and Live a Life You Love.  She is the author of  "Yes You Really Can: Live the Life of Your Dreams", and the contributing author of  "The Women's Handbook for Self Confidence".

Carla's books, newsletters, articles, and Blog offers inspiration, encouragement, and support that helps others create and live a life they love, achieve their goals and live there dreams,  and overcome challenges and setbacks,

Follow Carla:
Website www.carlaburrows.com
Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/pages/Carla-Burrows

Dreams are Meant to Be Lived

Do you own a dream or do you pursue your dreams wholeheartedly?

Just the other week I autographed a copy of my book for someone. What I wrote on the pages prior to signing my name was "Dreams are meant to be lived". That quote really got to me. I began to take the quote to heart.

What kept coming to mind were thoughts such as "dreams are meant to be lived and to live is doing- living is being". Living is an action, it is what you do every day.  

The true value of a dream is action. I realized that if I planned to make my dreams a reality, I had to get real serious about taking some action. I realized that I wanted to do more than own my dream, I wanted to live it. After much contemplation I decided that there where a few things I could do to ensure that I was valuing my dream by taking a couple of key actions steps. Just wanted to share these actions steps with you, just in case you too decide to pursue your dream wholeheartedly.


1. Make a decision- I decided to devote time daily to the pursuit of my dreams
2. Do something everyday that give life to your dreams.
3. Accept that God has a plan of success for you life, but it requires that you actively participate    in the plan that he has shown you through your dreams and desires.
4. Share you dreams and pursuits with others, no one can live life alone (remember dreams are meant to be lived).
 

                 "Dreams get you started; discipline keeps you going"-Jim Rohn.

 

 

 

 



Defining Happiness

Are your happy with your life? Do you know what it will take to make you happy? I used to think happiness was about having it "ALL". What I have come to realize is that I do not want "ALL", in terms of what other people says a woman should have, do, or become.  For instance, I do not have biological children because for whatever reason, God did not open that door for me, but in spite of that, I am extremely happy. I do not drive the car that successful people have deemed the "must have" vehicle. Not because I can't afford it, but because I have not desired it up to this point. However, I am still happy. I am not self-employed yet, because I made the conscious choice to put that dream on hold while I earn my degree, yet I am happy. There are so many unmet goals yet to achieve and I am not yet wealthy the way I desire to be however, knowing that I have the power to pursue and obtain "ALL" that God has predestined for me brings me so much joy. I have learned that happiness is a mixture of my relationships, my inner power and my pursuit of the dreams and desires God has placed within my heart.

 

I challenge you to take a moment today to discover what makes you happy. How will you know when your are living a successful life. Define happiness and success on your own terms. Take advantage of your God-given ability to discover and own your power to choose the direction of your life, decide the path of your future, and live the life of your dreams.

Reconnecting With Your Life

 

This week I have been taking a much needed stay-cation. The day before my stay-cation actually started someone asked me what I planned to do. The wanted to know if I was going away on a fabulous vacation such as a cruise or a resort. I told them that I I was not going away, I was planning to stay home and reconnect with my life.

For the past two years I have been working towards my Bachelors degree while holding down a full time job. I have always been one to take my responsibilities seriously and give so much of myself trying to be excellent at whatever I do. Add work and school to my responsibilities as a homeowner and a wife and you end up with exhaustion.

I did not want a vacation from my life, I simply desired the opportunity to reconnect with my life. I desired to read a couple of great books (have already read three in the past 6 days), plant flowers in my gardens, and set up my home gym so that I can dedicate time to working out at home instead of trying to find time to travel to the gym and work out.

I am to be able to look out of my new office/gym window while writing or working out on my elliptical at the beautiful scenery of my trees and azaleas that were planted. I was able to paint my bedroom overlooking the garden and set up my office and gym. However, I did have to get help to plant the trees and shrubs. I even had time to plant peonies and hydrangeas in my garden outside my kitchen window.

I know it seems as if I took a vacation just to work, however, planting and decorating are hobbies for me. Not only are they things I really enjoy but I get gfreat pleasure from looking at beautiful things such as greenery, plants and a tastefully decorated rooms. Even though I have not yet added the finishing touches to my home gym, it has already provided me with an opportunity to move forward with two of my most important goals for this season in my life, to be healthy and to embrace my desire to write.

Tonight I plan to go to Wednesday night bible study and connect with some of the wonderful people at the Church that I recently joined. I am hoping to fulfill another desire of mine, to take advantage of the opportunity to connect with a spiritual family. Since moving back to this area, I have longed to do just that.

Are you in need of a stay-cation so that you can reconnect with your life?

Consider taking some time real soon to dedicate to doing things that you are passionate about. For me it was reconnecting to my home, my community, and  spirit. For you it could be something like training for a marathon, taking time out to enjoy your family, reconnecting with your mate, maybe taking a class to learn a new skill or enjoying a new hobby.  Maybe you desire to connect with your own community in a meaningful and significant way. Life cannot always be about work and education. Their are seasons for it of course, but when you can take time to reconnect with the rest of your life.

What's Your Definition of Success

Over the years I have wrestled with discovering exactly what God wanted me to do in order to live out my purpose. I have always know that God has a specific plan for my life. Part of that plan involves fulfilling what I believe to be His purpose for my life. I have always known that I would somehow minister (serve) others. However, serving others can be accomplished in so many different ways.

Back in 2009, while driving in my car, headed to see a client of mine. I heard this voice within me state, "Empower others to succeed in life and work". For so long I struggled with including this as part of my life's purpose. The reason for this struggle was because I felt just like so many other who feel that success is a focus on extrinsic factors such as money and possessions. For the past couple of years this thought has kept me from pursuing my God-inspired purpose, which is to "help women of faith and purpose, discover, pursue, and live their God-inspired dreams." As a result of living their God-inspired dreams, they will be successful in life and work.

Knowing this was still not enough for me to let go of such debilitating thoughts about success. So I took out my journal, started writing, and defined what success really meant for me. Here is my definition of success.

• Living a Spirit led life
• Honoring and pursuing my God-inspired dreams
• Being happy and passionate about my life and the work I do
• Leaving a legacy (footprints) for others to follow when searching for help, hope, and direction for their own lives

What about you? What is your definition from success? The great part of it all is that we are all unique and God has a unique plan for all of our lives. I refuse to hold back any longer from pursuing my purpose because now I have clarity.

Your turn. Take out your journal or a piece of paper and start writing. Even better, share your definition of success with the world by posting your response right here. Own your unique purpose and get on the path to discovering happiness and success in life and work.

Carla Burrows- Author, Speaker

Change Your Vision. Change Your Life

3 Keys to Mastering Your Goals

 

 

 

It's the first week in March and like many others I looked over my goals and realized that I was no where I had hope to be in a couple of key areas. I am such a visionary and optimist that I sometimes get lost in the dream process. I love dreaming. Of course there is nothing wrong with dreaming big dreams, it is the beginning process of creating something great for your life. However, unless you get focused on taking action toward making your vision  your reality, you will find yourself stuck in the dream stage.

What about you? Have you taken a look at your goals to evaluate where you are in the process? Do you need to get past the dream stage and move forward, taking action toward mastering your goal? Great! I would like to share with you three things that helped me get back on track to making my dreams a reality.

• Key # 1-  Revisit Your Goals- Look over your list of goals and decide which will make the biggest impact in your life right now. What do you want to achieve in the next month. My original list of goals were a page and a half long. Whoa! No wonder I felt overwhelmed and unable to move forward. I decided to listed the top three priorities and underneath I wrote out 3 things to devote my time to this month.from each. Are you feeling overwhelmed by your list of goals. If so consider revisiting your goals and choose to work on your top priorities.

• Key # 2-  Give Yourself Permission to Change Your Routine- After writing out my priorities, it became apparent to me that I would not be able to work on my daily interventions without rearranging my daily routine. for instance if I wanted to work out 4-5 days a week, I would have to change the time from evening to mornings and work out at home instead of the gym most on most days. What about you? Do you need to change your routine around in order to get things done?

• Key # 3- Focus On Intervention- Nurses develop something called care plans for their clients as a way to identify a problems, decide on a specific, measurable goal and design a course of action to take to reach the desired goals. They refer to the plans of action as interventions. The interventions are written out in a way to identify exactly how often the interventions will take place, such as daily or 3 times weekly.  Even though reaching the desired goal is the target, the daily focus is put on the interventions. If you can follow your daily or weekly interventions, in most cases you will find that at the end of the designated time frame you will have reached your goal. Go ahead give it a try. Choose just 1-3 interventions to focus on for your desired goal.

Here is an example of what I wrote out as a way to reach one of the goals that I decided was a top priority in my own life.

Goal- Write material to help other discover, pursue, and live their God-inspired purpose.
Interventions-

• Write and post blog 2 times weekly
• Develop 1 information product designed to help others discover, pursue, and live their God-inspired purpose within next 30 days.  

I set this as one of my goals at the start of the year as a way to honor and pursue my own God-inspired purpose. Somehow the vision seemed overwhelming. After much prayer and contemplation, I came to the understanding that I was too focused on the big picture. Doing so made the thought of moving forward seem impossible. However, once I followed this much simpler process, I was able to move forward with my plans.

Get started. Try it yourself and discover how much easier it will be to reach your goals. Let me know if this was helpful to you. Also when you move forward toward reaching your goal, please feel free to share your success story with me.